Getting Discouraged

I know I cannot expect to lose alot of weight at a fast pace (although I *did* back in '90 LOL), but to lose nothing so far is upsetting.....I know eating habits come into play too, but the thing is I have been eating better.....and I am alot more active.....so I dunno what's going on.....all I know is it's making me sad to step on the scale & see no change =(

Monday I did 15 minutes of walking, Tuesday I did 15 minutes vacuuming/15 elliptical/30 walking, and Wednesday I did 15 minutes walking/22 elliptical @ res2, 1012steps, pace 30-40, 165 calories burned

For me to do something I dislike so much & not see any results is very discouraging =( I started all excited & now I feel like doodoo. I am going to incorporate the meal plan too, see if that helps, but I hate hate hate diets so we'll see......ugh

Today's Exercise & Whatnot

So, I didn't do any more on the elliptical until today, due to 1)I admit, laziness but also 2)Brinley acting more than needy the past few days....I wish she'd get her teeth already! She's also hit this stage where she wants me & definately knows the difference between Mommy & anyone else! For instance, last night she was getting fussy so both Jerry & Garrett tried to rock her, & let her swing, because I was going to try to get some exercise in.....well she never would calm down, so I took her & no sooner than I started to rock her she quit crying immediately & went to sleep! It's nice to know she knows me, but it doesn't make things easy sometimes LOL I'd rather hold & spend time with my children than exercise any day though......

Anyhoo, now for the "go me!"part.....today, I did 42 non-stop minutes/1680 steps/burned 300 calories!! I was sooooo ecstatic when I accomplished that, I couldn't believe I was actually able to do it!! Now I just need to keep it up!!

Today's Exercise

• So far have done 15 min non-stop/500 "revolutions/steps" on resistance 2 on elliptical
• Will update with tonight's min/steps

Today's Exercise

I can't believe it, but I was actually able to do 24 minutes non-stop on the elliptical tonight!! Instead of trying to go fast, I kept it slow but steady, & was able to complete 24 min, 1185 "revolutions" or "steps", & burned 150 calories....I know 150 is not much, but it's a start!! I am so freakin' proud of myself & so very very thankful to have the strength to complete what I thought was impossible....it was truly amazing to me & a very emotional experience! I just want to give a shout out to Christa to encourage her in doing what she can when she can, because even the smallest amount matters!! Thank you for encouraging me as well!! And to Tiffany, I also want to thank you for the inspiration....I think you're an amazing person & just by you being you, it helps me in ways you don't even know.

Okay, I am obviously getting loopy now so I am headed to bed......but again, Thank You!!

So....

I'm thinking of joining the 50million pound challenge, so I can use the meal plan made by Dr Ian as a guide & to log my exercise/eating/etc.....please wish me luck (& encourage me!) My hopes of having my friend be my personal trainer have gone out the window.....what a butthead for lying to me =(

I did 30 min (albeit it not non-stop, but a full 30 min nonetheless!) on the elliptical tonight, so YAY for that! I found my good headphones for my mp3 player tonight, so was very excited about that b/c music is a big motivator for me. I am proud of myself for sticking to my guns to exercise today!

I just hope I can meet my end goal eventually.....for now I am trying a shorter goal, in the hopes of "if I can just get that done, then I can worry with the next goal"....in total my ultimate goal is an embarrassing 115 lbs....for now I'm trying for 20, then after that 20 more, then after that 20 more, and so on......please please please pray for me, as this is a huge struggle for me (no pun intended) & weight loss does not come easy for me at all.....

Thank you!

Proof I Was Once Thin & Hot....

I came across some pics of when I was younger, & thought it'd be fun & great to my self-esteem to prove I once was thin & hot....it's funny how much more I was accepted when I looked like this, especially at church....personality is the same, all that changed is I got fat....just goes to show how much looks plays a part in dealings with people....


This one is my fave, good gracious my cheekbones! Is it a wonder I had a modeling company approach me?

This one was while I was at NC State *go Wolfpack!*


This was Senior Year of HS & I weighed about 140

This was Senior Prom, dayum I was skinny!
(p.s. ignore the white/grey smudges above my head, the photo got wet somewhere down the line & the ink/finish messed up =( )

I doubt I will ever be this thin again, but I am going to try to get as close as I can.....I have to.....have to have to have to! Mostly for myself, but proving to others that the fatass too can look good would be an awesome reward! ;)